Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Work Uniform. It's Happening.

HEY COWORKERS! This one's for you*:

So, awhile back, an MLinker forwarded an article to me about a woman who wears the same thing to work everyday. I can't find the article now to repost for you because Internet, so I'm just going to TL:DR for you and add my thoughts/disclaimers. (<< I am so good at Internet slang, guys!)

Basically, this chick explained that she wears the same thing every day to equalize her place in the office while she competes in the rat race (like Steve Jobs! or Mark Zuckerberg!). It also helps her reduce the time it takes to get dressed in the morning, since she doesn't have to craft a perfectly appropriate yet still feminine outfit. There were probably more inspiring points she made, but this one resonated so strongly with me, that I basically remember nothing else, except her outfit of choice (white blouse, black slacks, and some weird bow thing to make it "pretty.").

I'm not a fashionista. And I hate picking out something to wear. So this work uniform is my new favorite thing.

It's not that I hate fashion by any means. I love scrolling through BCBG's website as much as the next girl and wondering how much I could get for my kidney so I can afford those beautiful Jimmy Choos, but that fashion gene that most women are blessed with never got to me. I've been in jeans and T-shirts since high school, and even my jeans are often a good four years behind the current trend.

So, no, I don't like picking out something to wear everyday.

My other personal conundrum with work clothes is that I ride my bike to work.
     A lot.
     In the summer.
     In Texas.
It's generally between 85-105 degrees when I go home for my lunch break to walk the dog.
     In the summer.
     In Texas.
You see the issue?

So that pretty much rules out anything with sleeves, pants, and polyester. Honestly, why I can't just wear athletic clothes everyday is beyond me. Harrumph to dress codes, amirte?

So, that leaves me with needing something sleeveless, pantless, and cotton. Luckily, last year, the stars aligned and I found this: the Target dress**.

I own it in 4 colors. One in blue, one in green stripes, one in teal stripes, (OMG, those are all just various of blue, and I just realized it. I really need some variety in my wardrobe colors. See? not a fashionista. SMH), and one in black. Correction--I now own three in black.

My favorite thing about this dress is how perfectly work appropriate it is: no cleavage, no thigh, no clingy-ness. Throw a cardigan on top, and I'm out the door. On my bike, because it's short enough to stay out of the way of the chains and peddles but long enough not to fly up and flash the nice landscaper men who are inevitably blowing grass around the sidewalks. Everyone wins.

So, I'm starting the work uniform with this dress in black. Never again will I waste time worrying about what to wear instead of using that time more wisely (like making bacon).

It's genius.

So, dear coworkers, from now until I get bored of this experiment (or, really, until it turns cold again and I can go back to wearing my jeans from 2012), expect to see a whole lot of the same outta me. Don't worry, I'll do laundry and just buy more black versions of this dress if they start to get frumpy. I may switch out the cardigan, but let's be honest, I'll probably just wrap up in my Snuggie as soon as I get in anyway. Either way, it's black dresses from here on out. Thanks, Target. 

*In which I pretend like y'all will even notice that I'm wearing the same thing everyday.

**Target did not pay me for writing this post and praising the most prefect dress ever. But, hey, Target, if you wanted to, that'd be great. I'd probably just spend those dollars buying more of these dresses anyway. You can find me at your Lewisville store about six times a week. I'll be the one in the black dress.

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